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You are my city.

Your eyes are the gates,
Your soul is my transport
Your veins the roads I must travel.

You should never ever be afraid
of my knowing you too well.
Or of my being too close to you.


After all,

Can you ever,
Even after living your whole life in it,

Know a city too well?
K

This is for you.

Thank you for saving me from myself, my Knight in Black Cotton. I owe you in measures of love, life and ebbs of silken souled hearts.

Sweet and Low in Bright Lights of Beyond,

N.


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:iconhammer777:
hammer777 Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014
My feelings towards San Andreas. Ahh, good times....:P
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:iconsymphonyoftheheart:
symphonyoftheheart Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
Beautiful:)
Reply
:iconbegginermay:
BegginerMay Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2012  Student Artist
i love this so so so much.
Reply
:iconjabberbug:
JabberBug Featured By Owner Sep 6, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This poem is beautiful :)
Reply
:iconlolimoetan:
LoliMoetan Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012
This reminds me of the one I love! <3
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
:glomp:
Reply
:icontwinagatedragons:
TwinAgateDragons Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Very nice....love the style and the message!
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!! :D
Reply
:iconlordoftheringsfan:
LordOfTheRingsFan Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Wow, you are such an excellent writer... and easily relatable. I used to be able to relate to this so well.
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Awww!! Thank you!! :D
Reply
:iconpurpleobsessedninja:
PurpleObsessedNinja Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I hope the best for you two! this is beautiful!
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you soooo much!! :D
Reply
:iconpurpleobsessedninja:
PurpleObsessedNinja Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
you're very welcome :)
Reply
:iconcaelianna:
Caelianna Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
This. Hit me. Right in the feels.

.... Really lovely.... I dunno, I've been struck dumb by the simplicity and power of this short piece. Anyway, I love you.
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Aw! :blush: I love you too!!
Reply
:iconcaelianna:
Caelianna Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
:love:
Reply
:iconcosmosgrl19:
cosmosgrl19 Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
I love you.

xD But on a serious note: this was beautiful and I like how you used the veins as roads and eyes as gates :) The soul being transport is perhaps my favorite metaphor~ You're work is ever more beautiful :heart:
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!! Your comments are always awesome, Misty! :D
Reply
:iconcosmosgrl19:
cosmosgrl19 Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
glad to read your work, and you're very welcome, Honey~! :heart:
Reply
:iconlacriyme:
Lacriyme Featured By Owner Aug 25, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
So beautiful <3
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
:heart:
Reply
:iconhaphazardmelody:
haphazardmelody Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I love the analogy here. So much emotion in your work! Love it.
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for saying that. :hug:
Reply
:iconcyimang:
cyimang Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
That is very lovely:) Words can't express what this means to mean to me(mostly because I'm burned out
and think of what I want to say:(), but it rings true: "Where else could you find safety and love, then the
place you know from long ago?"
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 29, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Awww, thank you for this lovely comment!! :D
Reply
:iconcyimang:
cyimang Featured By Owner Aug 30, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
You are very welcome:)
Reply
:iconsweetsandcharades:
SweetsAndCharades Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012
I love your description/author's note even more than the actual poem :heart:
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Awww...thank you!! :heart:
Reply
:iconcinders-rose:
Cinders-Rose Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012
Simple words yet they are beautiful, some of the best things are.
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks sooo much, my darling. :)
Reply
:iconirrendernarr42:
irrenderNarr42 Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
beautiful:)
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you! :)
Reply
:iconirrendernarr42:
irrenderNarr42 Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
pleasure:D
Reply
:iconempressofunderbed:
EmpressOfUnderbed Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012
I know that when I write a poem and ask for comments, I'm looking for tough love- I want to know what I can do to improve the poem, or changes I could make to have a version 2.0. On this basis, I'll offer a critique that will (hopefully) not be offensive, but seriously, I like this the way it is already. I'm not sure whether this is just right, or whether it needs more detail! This poem has a beautiful sentiment, but I'd like to it lengthened by a stanza or two- what style of architecture reigns in this city, and what does it say about the object of your affections (I might indicate this in a word or two describing the gates. What color are they? Do they look like wood from a distance, but up close are metal? Are they painted? Do they have a pattern? Are they rococo, gothic, or country cottage? Are the gates heavily defended, or are they open for the world to see?) If you change just ONE THING, though, I'd like it to be the word 'transport', which I found seriously distracting- it just doesn't flow right. That's really easy to fix, though, in a similar way to what I just suggested (car, hackney, bicycle, train? Color? Speed- fast or slow?) The last two stanzas might (keyword being *might*- if this was my poem, I'd have to try it out and see if I liked it, because I might not!) be improved by addressing this question: why should the object of your affections not be afraid of you getting too close? Are you the most comfortable and/or happy in a place where you know every flower petal, or is it that cities (and the people in them) are always changing, giving you new things to explore every time you meet? Either way, this poem is great and can only go up from here. I'm looking forward to seeing the rest of your gallery!
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This is an incredible critique. I am blessed to have someone who spent this much time on my poem and I am so grateful for it. Thank you so much. You are an angel. :heart:
Reply
:iconblissful-day-dreamer:
Blissful-Day-Dreamer Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Student Writer
Gorgeous.

No other word for it ^^
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you sooooooooooo much. :glomp:
Reply
:iconeraven77:
ERaven77 Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Nicely done.
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
:glomp:
Reply
:iconeraven77:
ERaven77 Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thanks..
Reply
:iconkrusnik03:
Krusnik03 Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Lovely and very meaningful. c:
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much!! :D
Reply
:iconkrusnik03:
Krusnik03 Featured By Owner Aug 27, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Welcome, and I'm very sorry for the lateness."
Reply
:icongohibi:
GOHIBI Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2012
A beautiful poem written to one very blessed individual. Anyone to have you feel that way about them is truely honored.
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you soooo much. He's an amazing man. :)
Reply
:iconapollosun87:
ApolloSun87 Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This is absolutely gorgeous!
Reply
:iconuntamedunwanted:
UntamedUnwanted Featured By Owner Aug 24, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you!! :D
Reply
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