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August 11, 2013
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I am not here. These are not hospital walls. This is not a nurse who is speaking to me. That is not John unconscious, lying in a bed that faces due North, and that is not his mother trying to explain why his bed should always face North because he hates sleeping facing South.

This is not happening.

I am not taking a deep breath. I am not walking down the sickly white corridors with their bleach scent. I am not buying this cup of coffee from a cafeteria lady who is working at an hour that is reserved only for intensive care patients. This is not the way back to what is not John’s room.

That is not his heart rate dropping, and I am not running out of the room, screaming for help. We are not being pushed out, that door does not have a red light that claims intensive care, it has not been all night.

That is not John’s doctor explaining how they were not able to pump his stomach completely and it is not John who flat lined. That is not an empty hospital bed. That is not his mother in shock and these, these are definitely not my tears.

*

This is not a funeral. And if it is a funeral, it is not John’s. Because it just can’t be. I met him last week and he was fine.

We were fine.


*

“Name an unusual fact about the stomach.” He had asked me on one of our study dates.

“The stomach has acids strong enough to dissolve zinc.” I answered.

So he ate lead instead.
Denial, denial, denial.

No fancy words, nothing but the psychological state of denial.

www.facebook.com/pages/Untamed…
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:iconlithiumdelight:
LithiumDelight Oct 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Those last three lines hit me...and I just got out of bio class for the day. We need a little bit of zinc in our systems which is why our stomach acids can dissolve it...lead, not so much. 
Damn.
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:iconcaptive-hearts:
Captive-Hearts Sep 19, 2013  Student General Artist
Oh my god. That was incredible.
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:iconwintyrsnow:
This hits hard. Those last few lines - beautiful and heartbreaking ending.
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:iconrussiangentleman:
RussianGentleman Aug 28, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
You know, you might not be an author, but you are dfinietely my favorite writer now. I love the stuff you write. :3
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:iconpoeknowsprose:
Well done. Very emotional and powerful.
Reply
:iconrojozorra:
Rojozorra Aug 24, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Hit me right in the feels. You always seem to find an emotion and hit it on the head to drive it home with your words. And this is why I love your work.
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:icontoriaaa1819:
Wow.... I think my brain just did flips... Very emotional.
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:iconashurrii24:
ashurrii24 Aug 15, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
This is probably one of my favorite pieces you've done!
Thank you for your beautiful work! :D
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:iconlikepianomusic:
Incredibly powerful. Wow.
Reply
:iconmangosquirrel:
mangosquirrel Aug 14, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
the tidbits at the ending are really well done.
a wonderful and captivating piece; wonderful work.
Reply
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