Why I Hate Romantic Comedies

1.

Because they say that for every single boy who counts the stars, there is a little girl who is wishing upon one. (And they never mention what happens after the stars fade into morning and the other falls into oblivion)

2.

Because they say that people fall in love when the time is right, they are true to each other and are ready to be together. (But no one ever mentions how she is so damaged she can barely think, and he is so cynical that he may never be ready.)

3.

Because they insist that your soulmate is going to be a good, kind, caring human being who will love you from the bottom of their hearts. (This is due to the fact that even if there is someone for everyone, bad people are immune to the soulmate theory.)

4.

Because they always have a happy ending (And real life begins after the sun has set and she has realized that he may not be everything she hoped for and he begins to have second thoughts about commitment.)

5.

Because everything is assured in its predictability (And the trouble with predictability is that there is no room to be surprised.)

6.

Because there is such a thing as a big romantic gesture that makes everything all right. (And no one talks about what happens if she says no and that he’s made too many mistakes and her love for him has dried up.)

7.

Because even if I hate that every single thing they say is, and believe untrue, there is something that draws me back to them every single time. (It’s that stupid, tiny, romantic broken bone in my body that one day, I will find someone who tastes like gold, talks like silver and has a solid platinum heart too.)